Monday, May 24, 2010

There are a few people in the world who manage not to worry about things that are out of their control.

I am the opposite. I am entirely unprejudiced and worry indiscriminately about everything.

Which is why I spent the weekend in a state of high anxiety. A piece of the equipment I need for running my experiment stopped working on Friday. (Not my fault! Not even a participant’s fault.) My first (and only, as of yet) professional musician was due to come in for testing this morning and three more 1st years were scheduled for the afternoon. One of the research fellows offered to bring a replacement that he happened to have at home and promised to get in early.

Cue the worrying. Because what if he forgot? What if the musician got lost? What if the room was double booked? What if aliens invaded and messed up my programming?

Such were my thoughts all weekend. All anxiety-provoking and all out of my control.

The musician arrived on time. So did the musician. The room was not double booked. There were no aliens. But of course, the course of PhD research never did run smooth, and what did happen was that the replacement equipment didn’t work properly and no data was recorded for my One and Only Proper Musician, who, of course, did amazingly well on the task. Then my first 1st year was complete rubbish and gave me no useable data. Then the other two cancelled. Then I had to run a reading group in which half the big talkers were out for one reason or another, which meant I had to compensate by talking more myself and thereby dying a little bit inside.

It was a massive sigh of a day if there ever was one. At least, it was until I got home and remembered about my three packages of Cheez-its, newly imported from Chicago, lying in wait for me. And any day that ends with Cheez-its is a fantastic day! So now my life-force is replenished, my spirits are high, and I’m going to go pass out in total exhaustion with great expectations for the morning.

No comments: